Don’t be a “Lance”

bicycle_racerA bicycle: an elegant vehicle – thin, sleek, and fast, but not meant to have an arm or leg stuck in a spoke – especially mine.

This is my statement to cyclists everywhere – don’t be a “Lance” – an arrogant, dismissive d-bag who believes he/she has the right of way in every situation.

The “Lance” era is dead. The Great Lance no longer races his mighty bike. His true self has been exposed to the world – win by any means necessary. But he created a loyal following who believed in his philosophy and reinterpreted it as ride as if you own the road (or sidewalk), don’t communicate with pedestrians or vehicles, and when challenged by anyone, ‘give attitude’ or ‘the finger’.

The “Lance” Followers: Gentlemen in Tight Racing Outfits

The tragedy of baby boomers – skintight racing shorts and shirts.

To the older gentleman speeding along Park Drive in Stanley Park – you are not in the Tour de France and you will never ride in it. And fix your brakes or just use them for once.

“Don’t even think about it,” he says as he zooms past me.

“Oh, I wouldn’t even think of stepping on the road, because I know it’s against your nature to slow down or stop, which would mean someone, besides yourself, exists in the world. Yes sir, I know you see yourself about to win that ‘yellow jersey‘ but just ring a bell, or communicate without the attitude, ok?”

Running home, I formulate that speech in my mind.

But the next time I am disregarded while trying to cross a street, or trying to walk casually on a sidewalk, I will yell out:

“Don’t be a Lance!”


About Organized Bohemian

Dana M. Petric is a writer/landscape gardener/blogger/performer/office temp/web designer. Her wrestle between creative and money-making ventures permeates her writing. Self-publishing her first book, Growing Iris, Dana continues on her path toward writing full-time. Beginning her post-secondary education at UBC (Liberal Arts dropout), she prevailed at George Brown Theatre School (Theatre Arts Diploma) and matured at BCIT (Technical Writing Diploma). She lives in Vancouver, BC with her partner Eric and daughter Cleo.
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